Iran Plans to Blow the #*$! out of America

Iran, whose hobbies include field hockey, handicrafts, and Allah, is allegedly in construction of a nuclear program capable of creating 40-50 bombs - all of which would be used to blow up America as soon as tomorrow.

President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has recently voiced annoyance with the North American country, saying "America complains too much. It is time to rid the world of all that noise."

Defense Department officials expressed chagrin over Ahmadinejad's direct threat to the USA's way of life. White House spokesman Tony Snow announced this morning: "We disapprove of Iran's uranium enrichment program and we discourage the use of nuclear weapons to blow up America. We don't know how we can stress this enough. Seriously, how many times do we have to tell you this before you just stop already???"

Ahmadinejad refused to comment, only stating that he does not make deals with whiners and infidels.